My Lunchtime Lament

I've been at home taking care of my kids for 6 years. It has flown by, it really has. I've loved it and sometimes I've hated it. I've always been grateful that I've been lucky enough to stay home and give my kids the extra time. Sometimes I'm a fantastic mom and sometimes I'm not.

This Fall all my kids are in school. Reya's in grade one, Wini JK, and Ruby is in preschool a few mornings a week. I've dreamed of the Fall of 2010. In my darkest parenting days, this September has been the light at the end of the tunnel. I have arrived!

Except now I'm not sure I wanted to get here so quickly. I feel a little out of sorts. What do I need all this free time for? Other moms I know are busy with projects and new jobs. They seem to have no problem filling their time. I feel like I'm just wandering the streets buying groceries to occupy myself, or am asking random people to hang out with me. I have projects too, you know. I just don't want to do them.

Now my little almost six year old is eating lunch at school. I don't see her all day. Mostly I'm fine with that. Soon they'll all be eating lunch at school. That I'm not cool with. Who's going to be my baby? I can't believe how fast they are growing up. Maybe I need to get a dog?

Smart Cookies for the Lunchbox
from Honest pretzel by Mollie Katzen

1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour
2 cups rolled oats
1/4 cup oat bran
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 cup apple sauce
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
1/4 cup canola oil
1 tsp vanilla extract
3/4 semisweet chocolate chips
1/2 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup shredded unsweetened coconut

Preheat oven at 375 C. Combine the first 6 ingredients in a large bowl. Pour in the rest of the ingredients and mix well. Oil a 9 x 13 inch baking pan, and throw it all in there. Bake for 30 minutes. Take cookies out and cut into squares. Put squares on a baking tray and cook for 15 minutes longer. Remove and let cool before serving.

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